yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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