And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
