I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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