He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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