i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
