Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
