loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
