google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
