Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
