This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
