Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
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