Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize