For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
