and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
