If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
