the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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