his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
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