Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
