Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
