one two three fourrrrnication!
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
