ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
