were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize
