turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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