eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
