Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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