big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
