oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
