as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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