I love black thongs
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize