If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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