Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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