Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
