rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
