He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
