i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
