How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
