Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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