I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize