Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
