Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize