She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
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