Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize