I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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