does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize