He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
third nipple confirmed
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
