The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
