Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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