Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
