I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
How's work?
Spinning.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
