That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
